^ Love it. :) Can I wheel out an oldie, in a similar vein?... Did you hear about the overweight, alcoholic transvestite? He just wanted to eat, drink and be Mary.
Clotilde gave her husband, Thibodeaux, a cell phone for Christmas. A few days after Christmas Thibodeaux and his friend, Boudreaux, are at the City Bar in Abbeville and Thibodeaux's cell phone rang. It was Clotilde. When he hung up, he looks at Boudreaux and says, "Mais, how did she know where I am?" ===================
I wasn't sure why my doctor prescribed LSD for my constipation until I saw a Dragon and shat myself
"Read my posts and see why we`re not allowed nice things anymore" "Brought to you straight from the People`s Republic of There`s Something Wrong With You . The Hoi Polloi Capital of the World"
Boudreaux and Pierre were walking through the woods one day, when Boudreaux grabbed Pierre by the arm pulling him back. Boudreaux says, "Whooee, Pierre, look at dat big hole you almost stepped in!" Pierre looks down into the hole, and says, "Whooee, Boudreaux, dat sure looks like a deep hole. I wonder how deep dat hole goes ?" They find a rock, and throw it into the hole, listening to see how long it will take to hit the bottom. They don't hear anything. They find a bigger rock and repeat the process, but still don't hear it hit. Pierre notices a railroad tie lying in the bushes, picks it up and throws it into the hole. While they are listening for the railroad tie to hit the bottom, a little billy goat comes running out of the bushes, runs right between them and jumps into the hole. A few minutes later, their friend, Thibodaux comes walking through the bushes. Boudreaux says, "Hey Thibodaux, what you doin' way out here in de woods?" Thibodaux answers, "Well I'm out here looking for my little billy goat." Pierre says, "You want to hear sometin funny, Thibodaux? The strangest ting just happend. A little billy goat just came running out dem bushes, and jumped right in dat deep hole right dere." Thibodaux says, "Oh dat couldn't have been my billy goat. My goat was tied to a railroad tie back in dose bushes!"
Top tip for quiet people , get some massive speakers , place them 1.6km from where you want to go , reel out the cable and rig a microphone to the other end and have a wank . People will then hear you coming a mile away .
"Read my posts and see why we`re not allowed nice things anymore" "Brought to you straight from the People`s Republic of There`s Something Wrong With You . The Hoi Polloi Capital of the World"
Had an email from Egypt , my mrs said its a scam , I agreed and replied its probably a pyramid scheme
"Read my posts and see why we`re not allowed nice things anymore" "Brought to you straight from the People`s Republic of There`s Something Wrong With You . The Hoi Polloi Capital of the World"
A man and a woman go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant , sat at their table , they notice a noise from the next table coming from a round box on it , suddenly its lid opens half an inch and an eye inside looks at them and then the lids drops shut . The couple look at each other and carry on eating , about 5 minutes later , the same thing happens again , the lid lifts slightly and the eye looks at them . They call over the waiter and ask "Excuse me , but what is in that box please ? " , the waiter replies , "Oh that sir , thats the Peking Duck" .
Post edited by Sartori at 2013-07-10 05:37:15
"Read my posts and see why we`re not allowed nice things anymore" "Brought to you straight from the People`s Republic of There`s Something Wrong With You . The Hoi Polloi Capital of the World"